My Bucket List

A bucket list is a very unusually both morbid and hopeful. We don't like death, we fear it often than not. So us humans have created a list (I love lists!) of things we hope to do before our last breath.

Here's mine. It's quite long and I have completed a few things on it already, which I'm quite pleased about...seeing as I made this 5 years ago.

This is my list of things I want to do before I die...it may keep growing.

So here it is:

Things to Do Before I Die

Note: If they have BOLD dates after them, it means I completed them on that date! 

1. Start an orphanage somewhere

2. Marry Nathan :D 04/07/2014

3. Complete my list of books that I want to read 

4. Have children

5. Live in Handorf

6. See Ireland

7. See Greece

8. See Italy

9. Be a Primary School Teacher NOV 2013

10. Meet James Marsden

11. Finish and have my songs sung by someone (someone famous would be nice)

12. See Russia

13. Watch all episodes of Dr. Who 

14. Learn Finnish

15. Eat a Scotch Egg (it looks yummy...and I want to try one :)

16. see a drive in movie OCT 2015

17. Live in the 1920s (unfortunately I don't think I'll get a chance unless someone builds a time machine that actually works!)

18. Live in the 1950s

19. ok so I think I should at least put down here now to build a time machine. or find the doctor

20. dance in a public place on bubble wrap with my friends! 2010

21. Be in two places at once (this is something out of a movie/book that I love and I really like how they achieved this one)

22. Travel and stay in every state and territory in Australia (I've been to 5 already as of 2013)

23. Own a Daschaund

24. Own a Mini Cooper

25. Own or hold a real life tea cup pig! They are beyond a doubt the cutest things!

26. Visit the Glass Beach in California

27. Get my driver's licence 5/3/2012!

28. Have a ride in a wheel chair...never have I actually sat in a wheel chair! I want to do it...hopefully only for funsies! 2016 (unfortunately it was not for funsies)

29. Get my hair cut by a professional hairdresser...yes I have never had my hair cut by anyone other than my mum, sister or dad...or myself.2012

30.Be the shortest in my family...but only because everyone out grew me...I actually look forward to this day...call me crazy but I like being short! 2011

31. get as many photos as possible before I die where I am on a round about with as many people as possible!

32. vote on an electoral roll 1 to 51 2013

33. help count up votes for an election

34. get a shirt that says Life and go and hand out lemons somewhere

35. Meet Lee Pace

36. Meet David Tennent 

37. Go to a World Expo 

38. Rescue and adopt at least one dog from RSPCA

39. Go on a cruise that is at least for one night

40. Go deep sea fishing

41. Catch a big fish more than 20cm

42. Own a bunny or at least pat and hold a bunny(HELD A BUNNY 2015)

43. Get to my recommended BMI

44. make every recipe in one recipe book

45. Prank Nathan really well 2016

46. Step foot on all 7 continents 

47. Help a hitchhiker

48. Have a Star Wars Marathon and seriously watch all of the movies

49. Attend the Olympic Games

50. Visit the Redwood National Park

51. Bob in the Dead Sea

52. Squash grapes for preparing wine

53.See the Northern Lights

54. Go to Japan and go to a natural spa and see Bunny Island

55. Ride an elephant

56. Be an extra 2011 see me here in the red shirt: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaO4zBS-PMQ this ad was shown in cinemas and on Tv in Queensland.

57. Sit for a portrait drawing/painting

58. See the Piano Guys live performance

59. See Petra

60. Go to Morocco 

So what's on your bucket list? 

My Family

I love my family. In particular I love family time!
Certain family members make me go crazy too.
Let me introduce them to you:


Name: David
Name meaning: beloved
Nickname: Dad
Date of birth: 13/3
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Occupation: Ex-gardener contractor, hobby farmer and owner builder
Favourite thing about them: Sense of humour and love of film
Least favourite thing about them: His negativity

Name: Anitta
Name meaning: grace
Nickname: Mummy
Date of birth: 12/11
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Occupation: Registered Nurse (an awesome one at that!)
Favourite thing about them: will always listen and talk with me.
Least favourite thing about them: Always giving advice, even when we don't want it.

Name: Jaana
Name meaning: God is gracious
Nickname: Big sis, Jaana Banana
Date of birth: 6/5
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Occupation: Florist/ Child carer
Favourite things about them: Shared love for Disney songs
Least favourite thing about them: Her dismissing attitude towards myself and others

Name: Samuel
Name meaning: God has heard
Nickname: Bro
Date of birth: 2/4
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Occupation: Chef
Favourite things about them: Always ready to give me a hug when he sees me
Least favourite thing about them: his lack of life outside of work

Name: Aili
Name meaning: blessed
Nickname: Lil sis
Date of birth: 22/2
Age: 18
Gender: Female
Occupation: Assistant in Nursing
Favourite things about them: Shared love of books
Least favourite thing about them: when she thinks I'm weird.

My Rules

If I think about it I have some rules that I try to live by, although I don't wake up each morning and say these are the rules you must follow. Unlike what I do in my classroom...haha

My three rules I live by:


The most important rule I live by is "Love the lord with all your heart, mind and soul."

Second most important: "Treat each other as you would like to be treated."

Third: "Always keep learning and improving!"

The first two do come from my faith in God. The third from my career. I love improving myself and learning! I think it is the way to get better and not get stuck in a rut.

So what are your three rules?

Last Time I Tried Something New

Actually I am currently in the process of trying something new.
I love cooking and baking. I have been cooking steadily since 2002 when I was in Year 7. But even before that I was inspired by my cake-maker and decorator Nana. She would always have something that she has made in her kitchen.
However, the cake decorating equipment were all passed to my older sister when my Nana passed away in 2006. Also my Nana had spent time with my older sister teaching her the skills, hence why my sister inherited the equipment.

So fast forward to this month....
A best friend of mine has her 26th birthday garden party coming up next weekend. I was casually asking her about her plans and if there was any way I could help her out. I asked if she had organised a cake yet. She had not. So I volunteered!
I decided I would try something new and see how I go decorating a cake with fondant and everything! I have never attempted this before!
I even did research at the library!
The cake is made but decorating will happen on Saturday (the day before).

I'll update you all on how it turns out! Looking forward to seeing the end product!

Best Quality

My best quality I think is my loving nature. I have a positive outlook on life so I always try to find the best in the people around me. Which often leads me to show my loving quality towards them. I treat them how I would want them to think the best of me and treat me the same.
A few ways I have developed my positive loving attitude are:

• Think of three positives before I go to sleep.
• Memorise bible verses about treating others the same way (this then reminds me when I am with others).
• Look for opportunities to help others. 
• Enjoy the time with others and truly listen (Still developing this).
• Surrounded myself first with likeminded people who also show love towards others.

I feel this quality also helps when team working in a work environment as it puts others before yourself and have the ultimate goal of keeping peace. 

There's No Place Like Home

I've been avidly watching the Block on Channel nine. I love the idea of starting completely fresh and designing a room. Despite the fact, that I don't think I have much talent for it. But I guess this is the idea of the reality TV show...that the contestants get to practise.

The place I currently call home is my second home away from home. That is to say, it is the second house I have lived in with my husband since leaving my family to get married. I prefer this house because, although it really is a duplex it feels like a whole house with three bedrooms, a bathroom and ensuite and a large living area. It also has a double garage. It is located a sweet 300 metre walk from my workplace and fairly close to the local shops but not close enough to walk. It is on the corner of a dead end street so this lessens how much traffic we get. IDEAL!

Nevertheless, we still have some nuisances around the property. One is small but it bugs me. In our ensuite it has the toilet roll holder on the bottom of the window sill which is located a whole 10 centimetres off the floor! So low! Another thing that is a nuisance is the whiteness of everything. White tiles, white walls and white cupboards. I rather like timber through a house. I am realising now what my dream house will one day look like. Lastly, I dislike how far away our place is from my family. We have to drive 45 minutes to go see my family! I love my family and would love to spend more time catching up, very much unlike my husband! But I have resigned myself to the fact that I need to be content with the weekend visits and holiday times. After all, when a woman and man marry they should leave their families and begin their own.

I am glad that I have the wonderful opportunity to develop my own household routine and style but it's in the toughest of times that I find that I sometimes need more than just my husband to comfort me.

The saying, "Home is where the heart is," is definitely true for me though! I love my husband and know that wherever he is I will find my shelter and home.

My Last Bad Day

I wish it was my last bad day that I would ever experience but one of the facts of life is that we all have good days and bad days.
I'm trying to decide what constitutes a bad day though. I have had bad moments today and throughout the past week as well as a bad mood in the last week.

Urban Dictionary defines a 'bad day' as "The day you wake up hit your head on numerous objects, trip on several steps, and coincidentally spill mustard on your white (insert type of clothing here). Usually formulates around Mondays and/or any days of a menstrual cycle (this includes males)"

Yep. That would have to be quite accurate I would say!

Well going by that definition I would say my last bad day was on Sunday previously. I was to travel with my husband's parents, sister and our nephew to Coffs Harbour. Which takes about 5 hours by car; 6 with a baby. I was feeling sick, tired and stressed. Sick - hay fever. Tired - poor sleep the night before. Stressed - I had fallen over the Thursday before and had hurt myself. This meant I was a day behind in my unit planning for term 4. I was also stressed about the two days I would be spending with my husband's family without him and having to be in close proximity with a 9 month old baby when I am still dealing with my emotions from earlier in the year!

SO yes quite a bad start to the day. I thankfully did not spill anything on my clothing but sitting in a crowded car for 5 hours with a baby seat squishing me was not my idea of fun! I also had the red tide come to visit that day too.

And because this happened on a Sunday I could just see my Monday being just a bleak.

Thankfully I survived and returned to my loving husband who completely understood and let me sleep peacefully through Tuesday!

Biggest Change in the past year

My biggest change this year has been mentally. I have learnt so much this year about what it means to be an adult. I have taken a more serious approach to keeping house because I have realised after my ectopic pregnancy that I wasn't ready to have a child. It had opened my eyes to the serious responsibility of having children and how big of a change it is to your life. I am looking forward to the day when I do have children because I will be able to say, "Welcome child, I have prepared a place for you in my home. We are ready to have you here." I truly don't know what would have happened this year if my pregnancy had been successful. It would have definitely brought huge changes to my life and my family. I would probably still have realised that my house wasn't 'baby-ready' and done something about it but it would have been way more stressful and difficult. 

In a way I am glad to have the chance to make the changes now and not be stressed out about not being ready. I know my routine that is in place now will have to change several times once I have children. Knowing that I have a working routine now is the good foundation for a solid routine when I have children. 

Currently my sister-in-law and her son (my gorgeous nephew) are staying at our place, along with my parents-in-law. I have seen things! haha There is so much to do when you have a child and although it looks challenging I still want to do it! I truly want to have children because they are such a gift. 

I will accept God's gifts in whichever form they come. If He chooses that we have no biological children that will be my life purpose, but I know He has great things in store for me. 

The one dream I just can't shake

PUPPIES!

I have always wanted my very own puppy. I love animals and in particular dogs. At present we are in a rental that allows us to have pets. To have a dog however, we must keep it outside at all times. Our yard is quite small and the fence not very high. This limits the kind of dog we have. We therefore, decided to wait until we own a house ourselves.
My pet parakeet was put down this week due to illness. It has left me feeling like I may not be a good pet owner, as well as lonely. I loved Pidgey, he would whistle to me, eat dinner at the same time as us, and I managed to settle him as he wasn't hand raised. I would love a dog but a bird is my next best option at the moment. I can't have a cat as I'm allergic. Birds are sweet to have too! I love dogs as it means they cuddle and play with you. Birds can only do this to an extent. A pet brings comfort and joy into your house that sometimes people can't do. They are God's blessings on earth.
I have spent this morning looking on pinterest at different dog breeds and saving pins of breeds that I would love to own. I chose very few large breeds as I find them hard to control when walking. I would like a dog that can sit comfortable on my lap or next to me. I don't want one that can jump up and eat something off the bench.
I found my favourite breeds at the moment are the Irish Terrier, Corgi and Schnauzer.
Have a look at the pins I saved on my board, I want a Puppy!

Let me know in the comments below of your favourite animal/pet or dog breed!

What I like about me

I like that I am usually a positive minded person and I am humble enough to be willing to change. I self -reflect and always try to improve myself. I don't want to become stuck in my ways and not willing to change. Everyone makes mistakes and need to realise they aren't perfect. Despite knowing I will never be perfect I wish to still improve. It gives me purpose and drive in life. God has given this attitude to me. It's a strange thing to like about myself because it's liking the fact that I'm not perfect and that I want to improve.

Physically, I like my hair and earlobes. I used to like my feet but this year I haven't had a good year with them as I was allergic to a pair of shoes and then had athlete's foot. But I love my small feet and the shape of my toes. Usually my skin is smooth to touch and very few blemishes which I like and feel lucky to have. Again however, my skin is not very nice, it's dry, pimply, and bumpy. I hope that my body returns to normal again soon. I have gone through huge health battles this year and my body is still adjusting.

I try not to be vain about my looks but I feel there is a place to be particular about them as it is the first thing people see of you. This to me, means that a good outward appearance helps others to accept you. Not putting in effort to look the best you can, sends the message that you don't care about yourself and makes people then not care about you.

Try not to let your appearance take over your life though. I wrote intentionally about myself internally first because I truly believe that who you are is more important than what you look like.

Dear Teenage Me...

Dear myself as a teen,

So you have grown up so you can see over more things...not by much and unfortunately there won't be much more growing in height either. But hey being short is lots of fun and it means there are plenty of guys out there that are taller than you!
You have gotten to high school and you are probably trying hard to figure out where you fit in. You may feel lost and helpless now but don't forget that you have God on your side looking out for you!
I know you may feel like no one loves you in your family and yes you have that whole argument as to why (eldest child gets special responsibility, only boy is special, and youngest if always doted on, and you, well there just isn't any reason to love you because you are that middle second eldest child.) BUT don't let that consume you and stop you from reaching out to your family. Don't deprive yourself of your family's love by sticking to loneliness in your bedroom. Go on! Go and spend some time with your family! I'm sure at least one of them will love it!
Take good care of your sibling's relationships. And when you get married at the age of 23 and a half make sure your siblings are in the bridal party. Doesn't matter if your sister wants to only do the flowers. Insist! Insist that she is more special to you than your best friends! If I could go back and change it, I would. Now your older sister is getting married and has left you out of the bridal party. It is likely because of that reason that you did have her in yours. So please, make sure you spend time with all of them and truly get to know them! It really isn't all about you!
And if you happen to get to my age and have made the same mistake as I did, make sure you just show love to your sister. Don't waste time hating her decisions. She probably hates yours.


Anyways you are probably desperately wondering if you marry that guy! Well...no. No. No you don't. So just stop pining away and focus on your studies. God's got it all in control! He has picked an excellent man out for you. Well he has his flaws, just like you but he loves you and just needs some prodding to get the ball rolling.
So forget E.C. Just forget him. He will only ever be a good friend and you will see him occasionally. Oh and forget all the guys at school. You won't meet Mr Right until you are at uni.

Oh and when you are on your gap year after Year 12?...yeah please be productive and don't say 'I hate you' to mum. You'll get kicked out if you do. Learnt that the hard way. Your parents are just trying to help you and encourage you to find a job.

Above all, remember to love God. He will never leave you nor forsake you.

Good luck and God bless!

<3 maija="" p="">

Happiest moment in my week

Yesterday my husband and I went for a walk (Yes it included Pokemon) in a nearby park. We regularly plan time together which we call 'marriage time.' This is purposely planned time to spend together and to work on our marriage. As we do plan for it each week it means that we rarely have to have a serious chat on these days as we usually feel close enough during the rest of the week to do that. However, it still allows time for those serious chats to happen.
This week was his turn to plan. He decided that we would go for a nice walk and continue on our Pokemon quest. We are playing it together on one account so it brings us together even more. It took a bit for us to sort out our selfish qualms in wanting to be the one to hold the phone, but we have peacefully resolved that issue and love playing it together!

Anyways, back to the main topic of my happiest moment. Well each week my happiest moment is marriage time! I love planning our time and working out what we can do each time. I love that it means my husband plans dates, which doesn't come naturally for him but it gets him thinking. I don't mind the simple dates because usually it allows for more talking and spending time together.

This coming week is my turn. I have decided that we will have some fun out and about at a local arcade and play some games together. We love all things nerdy and have found going to arcades as a good and fun way to spend time together. I might even organise a little competition for the day!
I have a Pinterest board that I have collected ideas for date nights and my favourite website has hundreds of ideas (datingdivas) for all kinds of dates.

If you have a partner or spouse make sure that when you are planning time together it does suit both your interests, or at least that you share the times to cover both interests!

Comment below with your best date ideas!

Making me laugh so much lately

These videos came up on my facebook news feed and made me laugh this week. 

Laughter is the best medicine so share it around! 

Stressin'

So lately I've been stressing about an upcoming Ultrasound. This is follow up from my ectopic earlier in they year. I'm also worried that I might become pregnant before the doctor's have cleared me. I mean our first pregnancy was an accident (a happy accident which become unfortunate), so what if that happened again before my body is ready?
A verse comes to mind:

I like this image. It brings to mind wishes. I care about having a child one day. I wish for it. But I trust God because he cares for me. I trust that He will give us a child, maybe more, when the time is right. 

Do you ever feel stressed about something, trust that it will happen in it's own time but it is still constantly on your mind? That's how it is for me. It is such a complex emotion! But for now I will just try to trust as best as I can in the one who created me. He has it all in His hands. 

One day...

Admiration, Amity and Awesomeness

Meet Emily. (On the left)

She is one of my longtime friends. We go way back! From being a mentor to me as a new leader at a youth group to playing together in our church's band to being there for me in grief to bible studies to same uni programs and her being in my bridal party; Emily has been a huge part of my life. She is an inspiration to me in my faith, marriage, teaching and art! (Photography and Nail art <3 nbsp="" p="">

Being a good friend that I am, I won't tell her personal stories, but I can say that from her personal dealings of life struggles I have gained much encouragement and wisdom as she shows strength and character in dealing with those hardships that come our way. She is gentle, caring and humble and gives glory to God for his faithfulness in our struggles. I have prayed for her and she for me. I admire her love for her family, passion for beauty in God's creation and faithfulness to God.
She is blessed beyond measure and I too for having her in my life.

Although we live far apart now we still keep in touch and regularly pray for each other. I thank God for Him blessing me with not only Emily as a friend but many other great friends! I chose to write about her only because I find her truly admirable.  So here's to the Emily's of the world, thank you for being someone to admire and look up to!
Never take your friends for granted. I will finish with this quote:

Interesting side note, I am currently reading 'Clara and Mr Tiffany' and in one of the chapters I read today it mentioned 0.Henry. I had never heard of him before and I found it interesting when this came up in my search for quotes on friendship. 

Word.

ineffable

ɪnˈɛfəb(ə)l/

adjective

1. too great or extreme to be expressed or described in words.

   "the ineffable mysteries of the soul"

   synonyms:

   inexpressible, indescribable, beyond words, beyond description, beggaring description;More

   • not to be uttered.

     "the ineffable Hebrew name that gentiles write as Jehovah"

   
   

When asked, "what word actually describes your life?", I have to answer with ineffable. My life, any life really, is too great to describe in words. To describe your life to someone they really need to experience it with you. They will then grow a greater understanding of who you are. I could share with you one word but does that truly sum up everything that has happened? And really when asked this question, the one word you pick will only reflect what your life is like at present. It won't take into account what happened 1, 2 or 10 years ago. Therefore, I give you 'ineffable'. Remember: "...you are worth more than many sparrows." (Matthew 10:31). Your life is great and amazing! Everyone's life is described by many words. That is if you ask the person. If you ask the Creator of that person, well He could use one I'm sure. 

Mine. 

God describes my life in one word when He says I am His. He loves us so much! Never forget that! 

Now if you asked what word I wish my life was described with. I would have to say, 'mother'. 

I am going through a difficult stage in my grief at the moment. Writing and talking about it is helping get through it. I wish I was a mother. I know I will be one day. But I'm not sure people understand that having another child doesn't replace the child I lost. I wanted to be the mother of that child! I will love and cherish my future children but it hurts to know I couldn't raise my first little child into a wonderful adult. My past is the past, I can't change it. It makes me bitter sometimes when I think about what has happened. But with God, He replenishes my spirit and gives me love, joy, hope and peace for the future. 

Let me know what word you would describe your life with. Or if you agree with ineffable! Would love to hear from my readers!  

Peace and blessings be with you! 

Maija

What holds me back

Something that I think holds me back is my worry. I am constantly worrying about something! Often at work it stops me from being confident and taking the initiative! I want to stop worrying so much but it is difficult. I know the best way to stop is to cast your worries on God. He will give me comfort and peace I know.

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7

Quote It!

My current favourite quote is this:

I have spent most of my developing years discovering what makes me happy. God, bright colours, animals, good books, friends and family all make me happy. I have spent almost the same amount of time developing good friendships and being quite choosy who I will spend my time with. Only because I want to spend time with people who I know will make me feel happy and so in turn I can make them happy. If people are negative or degrading I will not tolerate them because I hate feeling blue. (Although I love the colour!) 

If people are always looking for an argument and to pick a fight they will find it. I want the opposite; peace and happiness. So I search for it and I find it! 

Of course I will encounter people who do make me upset but I don't put up with them. I encourage them to be happy and positive and it is up to them to decide to change or stay the same. If they don't change I spend as little time as possible with them, but every time I am around them I will be positive and uplifting so as to encourage that behaviour. I don't see any harm in this approach as it is my choice who I spend time with.

A skill to learn...

I consider myself one of many talents and skills. But if you ask me what is one skill I would love to learn I would have to say to speak fluent Finnish. Which always makes me think of this movie! Haha.

I have tried several times to learn to speak Finnish. I'm slowly getting there. One day I hope to visit the home of my ancestors. I do love Finnish culture. All except their love of herrings! ugh!
So tell me....what skill would you like to learn?

Someone I love

If I could rewrite my vows this is what they would be:

I, Maija, take you,  Nathan, to be my husband to have and to hold from this day forward.
For all the smiles you put on my face. For all the tears I cry. I solemnly vow to always love you, no matter how you smell or look. I ask that you stay by my side when I am sick, in pain or in a fight. I promise to love you even when you do not listen to me and forget to do something I ask. I vow to communicate my thoughts and intentions through words and not just actions. I promise to be your cheerleader and full supporter. I promise to never compare you to other men. I vow to try to keep my temper when you do something I dislike. I promise to be the one to give you 100% attention when you ask for it. I promise to fulfil you to my potential and to not withhold my love for my own gain. I promise to respect, honour and cherish you forever and always!


Nathan, you are my husband and I will never leave you! I will never bring up the 'd' word in an argument.
I love you now and always!

In regards to weight loss...

So here's my plan on how to achieve and accomplish my wished for change:
Step 1. Get off my chair and be active.

Too often I find myself sitting down. I heard once that some scientists had researched how sitting down for too long can affect the adult body. Read here: Too much sitting! 
I have also been advised by my Chiropractor and Doctor that I need to be more active. So I have put in place a routine that requires me to be active for most of the day. I allow myself to relax at certain times in the day, for example when I wake up I begin by reading for 10 minutes to get my mind active! (Also to be able to keep up with my book club group!). In the mornings I will have breakfast and spend some time with God, reading His word and praying. I then will get ready for my work day by getting dressed and making my lunch. I tend to my pets and then begin working on my set chores for the day until I have to leave for work at 7:10am. At which point I walk 300 metres to my school. I have come to love walking to work because it means I am forcing myself to start being active. When on playground duty I remind myself to actually walk around and not stand in one spot. At the end of the day I walk home again and finish completing the rest of my chores.

Step 2. Do regular exercise.

I have never been in the habit of doing regular exercise. I try to be but it is difficult when you don't find it enjoyable. I don't find it enjoyable as I associate it with my pain and suffering of asthma. It truly is difficult to exercise without having an issue with asthma. My husband and I are going to begin tonight the following running program. I hope with his support we will be able to get into a habit of regular exercise.

Step 3. Eat less and healthier.

I am working quite well on this one. We purchased a menu planner from Target earlier this year and I began planning out our meals. Which meant that what we bought was mostly only what we needed for the recipes. A bonus was we cut down on waste. I have been eating less for a while now and I have seen the impact of this with losing a couple of kilos over a couple of weeks. 

So there is my three step plan on trying to achieve my wished for change. Comment with your wished for change and what you can do about it now! 

Wished for Change

If I could change something about myself it would have to be my weight. I want to be my ideal weight. I am currently working on losing it. There are several reasons I want to lose about 30kg.
1. My health
2. Increase chance of having a healthy pregnancy in the future.
3. Look better
4. Find clothes easier

I'm currently 91kg and want to be in the 60kg range. It's hard to imagine that, that is my ideal weight range. I have been over 60 kg since leaving school 7 years ago!
I have a dress I have purchased that is 2 sizes smaller than my current size. It is beautiful. I have nail wraps from Jamberry to match. I can't wear them!
My sister's wedding is in a year's time and I would love to wear that dress to her wedding! She and I are both working to lose weight. However, I think she is doing a lot more than I am. I want to slowly lose it so that I don't bounce weights. I want to know that I can control it.

Comment and let me know what is one thing you would like to change about yourself!

The best thing that happened this week!

This week has been one busy week! It included two school events at night and one late one with friends!
Monday was our school's church service. We had the Christian music group 'Endless Praise' come to share. They are excellent and it was fun!

Tuesday I completed my report comments for the first time ever ahead of schedule!

Wednesday night was my monthly book club meet up. We just finished reading 'Just a Girl' and now we are starting on 'The Tea Chest'. I'm excited about this book, it looks to be my cup of tea. Yes pun intended.

Thursday, Nathan and I opted for a night in for our weekly marriage time. We watched a couple of my favourite TV show episodes from 'Fresh off the Boat' and 'My Crazy Ex-Girlfriend'.

Friday night my school had an Open Night. I think it was the best open night we have had. I was excited about our Year 2 display.

Today, though involved the best thing that happened to me this week. I got to sleep in! I have never looked forward to the weekend more than this week. It was so amazing to sleep in this morning and to take the day slowly because we had nothing planned for the weekend. Which is exactly what I needed after a week like I had!

That being said, this week has been a good week. Catch you all soon!

Celebrate Come On!

On the weekend I celebrated with two of my friends (and my sister via Facey) EUROVISION! I love watching this every year! It is a lot of fun and for the first time I was able to host a bit of a party. My friends and I played a bit of a drinking game on Saturday night when we watched the 2nd Semi-Final encore.
It was so exciting to see Australia almost win! I was relieved though to see we did not. I believe it would be very insulting to the rest of the European countries if we won the second year into the competition. Some countries have been in for over a decade and still haven't won!
Well done to Ukraine! Yours was not my favourite but I could see your passion and dedication to music. It was lovely to know that your song was dedicated to your great grandmother.

I look forward to next year's Eurovision! I wonder who will be our entry!? I thought Iggy Azaela would be an interesting entrant for us!

Small Things that Make me Happy

1. the first few minutes of crawling into bed.
2. The smell of rain after a hot day.
3. The smell of my baking cooking.
4. Pidgey, my bird, tweeting to me.
5. Pidgey sitting on my hand/shoulder.
6. Admiral Ackbar, my fighter fish, swimming up and down in his tank cause he recognises me.
7. Flocks of birds flying in the sky.
8. My class listening intently as I read them a story dramatically.
9. The softness of certain fabrics.
10. The weight in the bed beside me that tells me my husband is right next to me.
11. Colour coordination of things, particularly outfits.
12. A cup of tea
13. Finding a verse that applies directly to my situation.
14. Any compliment directed towards me.
15. Carpeted waiting rooms, particularly at the doctors
16. New shoes.
17. Finding a new outfit match in my wardrobe.
18. Knowing all the lyrics to a song.
19. spending quality time with my family.
20. receiving a gift no matter how small.
21. Reminiscing about my childhood.

About Me.

An update on the girl born in December.

So since my last post this is what's new with me:

I am now teaching little Year 2's! I am so excited about teaching them and love it! I think I have found my niche of students! They are cute listeners and love their teacher really no matter what! We have a lot of fun. At the moment though we are focusing on making sure we follow instructions quickly and finish activities on time.

Late last year we bought a 2nd hand car from a dealership which we drove down to South Australia in. It was quite wonderful! We loved the trip and had a great adventure. We have also made a mini road trip down to Coffs Harbour, NSW for Easter this year.

Our lovely little nephew was born on Christmas Eve! He is a December baby like me! I'm glad to share the week with him! Louis is his name and he is adorable! He visited after Easter with his parents, uncle and Ma-Ma.

On a sad note...

hmm I hesitate to share this but it is now part of who I am and I want to spread awareness. It has been a struggle this weekend with Mother's day happening as I have recently recovered from an ectopic pregnancy. I discovered I was pregnant in March. The very next day I found myself in ER due to bleeding. I was declared a threatened miscarry. I was only 4 weeks pregnant at this stage. It was too early to see much on a scan so they waited two weeks. My first and second scan (a week apart) showed nothing in the womb. There appeared to be a mass on my left ovary. I was then declared to have an ectopic. It was an emotional rollercoaster! For the first week I knew that I was pregnant I was overjoyed but so worried as no woman wants to end up in ER! I had already begun to adjust to the pregnancy symptoms which I was getting and altering my lifestyle. After all this was an unexpected pregnancy. When I found out I had an ectopic I was devastated. I made the choice to let everyone know what was happening on the 30th April through Facebook. I wanted to openly grieve as for me it is the best way to process grief. Everyone was very supportive and many prayed. God brought me so many blessings despite what was happening. In all honesty the worst that happened was losing a baby. My health declined only slightly. They had caught it so early.
So the facts are these:
- I had an ectopic on my left side
-My pregnancy hormone (Hcg) was dropping naturally
-I was put initially on a plan to wait and see
-When my Hcg plateaued for a couple of days I needed further treatment
-I opted for a drug called Methotrexate.
-This is a chemo drug.
-I only needed one dose
- I am now fully recovered.
-I can not fall pregnant for the next 5 months, to protect the babies
-I am sad and confused as to why it happened
-I am thankful I did not need surgery and only needed one dose.
-I was terrified throughout the whole experience!
-It has not deterred me from wanting to have children in the future.

I share this all so ectopic pregnancy does not become a taboo subject. I kept saying to people: If anyone else died in my family everyone would know! So why not let everyone know about the little one I lost?!
Nathan was a huge support throughout it all. He was distraught about losing our little one but loves me all the same. We named out little one Jamie.
I am not ashamed for this happening. It was not anyone's fault, it is part of life. I am confused as to why it happened because in God's word it says:
 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
However, perhaps God worked the good so that I could keep my ovary and tube in tact and continue to have pregnancies from either ovary in the future. He kept me from extreme pain and risk of infection. 
I do not wish this experience on anyone. But if you know of someone who is or has gone through this or something similar: 
-Don't ask them about their plans for future children
-Be mindful on Mother's day or Father's day (especially if they have no children yet)
-Make them feel good about their bodies.
-Remind them of the blessings they do have in their life.
-Continue to include them in things if they want to; don't assume!
-Be there for them when they need to cry and just listen. 

So that's what's new with me. I really needed to write that all down! I will finish with a letter to my little Jamie:

Dear Jamie,

I did not see you physically but I felt you. 

I know you were alive, but for a short time. 

Thank you for having me as your mother. 

I'm sorry you never got to grow bigger than a blueberry. 

I'm sorry the timing wasn't right. 

I know I will see you one day in heaven with God. 

I can't wait to know you fully. 

I want you to know that your daddy and I love you so much! 

We would have given you all the hugs you want.

I imagine that you are a girl but I never knew for sure. I never will know. 

It wouldn't matter though! We would love you no matter what!

You are my child, whom I love, with you I am well pleased. - words you never got to hear with your little ears. I am pleased with you! You have not done anything wrong! It is not your fault little one! 

You will always be in my heart and the apple of my eye! 

Love you forever and always,

Mummy